How did I do THAT to spaghetti sauce!?!

December 4, 2009

Tonight I was cooking, which seems to occupy my hands enough to let my mind wander creatively.

<!–more (Hmm, I wonder if I would become a creative genius if I pursued a career in manual labor? My most prolific period was certainly when I worked in retail…) –>

Anyway, my mind was wandering, and it decided to replay bits of Notting Hill. Do you remember the sequence where Hugh Grant’s friends are all bringing girls to dinner for him to meet? His slightly-New-Age-artsy-punk-rock little sister introduces a friend who proclaims herself a “fruitarian”–for our purposes, she only eats fruits and vegetables that fall from plants on their own. (I am all New-Agey and enlightened enough myself to realize that actual fruitarians are an eensy bit more sane than that, but we will deal strictly with fruitarians as they are defined in the film.)

The dialogue is, roughly:

Fruitarian: I only eat fruits and vegetables that fall from plants on their own.
All the friends at the table blink at one another. Bunny (Hugh Grant’s sister) looks faintly embarassed.

Hugh Grant: (blinks affably and stammers in befuddled, charming way) Oh I see. . . so, er, these carrots?

Fruitarian: Were murdered, yes.

All exchange looks. Hugh Grant appears affably befuddled and charming.

Aside from Hugh Grants attributes (let’s admit it, folks–the man can act precisely ONE character. . . but damned if it’s not an affably charming one), the scene raises a question that I feel really needs to be addressed. The writers claim they ignored it for something about “storyline” and “pacing” and “are you seriously asking us this”, and a quick google search didn’t give me the answer, so I shall lay the quandry bare before you, Gentle Readers.

Would this woman cut the grass in her yard?

She’s not going to be eating it, and she’s not going to kill the plant itself, but if one follows the metaphor, it would certainly be week after week of assault and amputation.




  1. Would this woman cut the grass in her yard?
    No, but she may buy a goat.

  2. Seems like she’d consider that aiding and abetting. . .

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